What is forgiveness?
Can I really forgive all those people who cut me off, bullied me, cheated on me, talked behind my back, physically assaulted me, judged met, or made me feel significantly less than?
Don’t I owe it to the universe to balance the scales of justice? Shouldn’t I take the time to express all these pent up emotions now that I am stronger and brighter and have more ability of getting back at them?
I’ve been looking forward to the right day, scheming and planning that right approach, knowing that when I was ready I would rain down in a fury that would teach these people a lesson of all lessons!
I almost crave for the right day to lash out teach these terrible people to never hurt anyone again!
For most of my life I never really knew how to react when I got angry and always got overwhelmed with dealing with the emotions! As much as I don’t want to hold on to these fear filled uncomfortable memories, they always seem to surface and I’m left with the same powerless feelings!
I guess we all get to a day when we just want to move on with things and let people be who they are (imperfect, I know!) because our own well-being is more valuable. We seek the quickest solution we can find and start to take the steps that are dictated to us so frequently! No matter what author, webpage, book, or speaker you are listening to at the time of research, the message is always the same, “forgiving people creates freedom!” Still as I write this message down today, my ego wants resist this notion of moving on. I instantly go to a place of justifying my anger and frustration, and I fuel the fire again and again!
Stop It! ….Enough!
It’s time to bring some peace into your mind where that resentment use to live!
Have you ever caused pain or harmed anyone, big or small?
Do you know exactly what was going on in the mind of the accuser at the moment the situation took place?
Can you re-live the moment in your mind and create a new positive ending to the problem?
Can you trust that no one in their right, healthy mind would ever lash out on the innocent unless they were in a place of fear themselves.Potentially their reaction was just masking inferiority and they really only wanted and needed love?
Would you want someone that you caused hurt to – to take the time to forgive you for your past mistakes?
Do you not just think that these people were doing the best they could with the knowledge and skills they had at the time?
We hold all these incredible expectations over people instead of aligning oursleves with the solutions. Instead of detaching, we connect to the situation and inflame the wound, breading more defence and more power for us to hold onto injustice, something that ego loves to take hold of!
So next time that person cuts you off on the road for example, what are your solutions? How can you align yourself with the solution faster, and move on in a proactive manner?
- Do you lose your cool and focus on these terrible people that are ruining your day and disrespecting you?
- Do you get really defensive and drive up to them at the next stop light and verbally lash out?
- Do you give them space and say to yourself, ” I have done the exact same thing before, and it’s ok”!
- Do you instantly acknowledge the situation and frame it in a context of “Maybe they didn’t see me. Maybe I might have been in their blindspot. I know how stressful it can be to drive sometimes and how easy it is to make mistakes”!
As much as we don’t want to acknowledge, we play a big part in the experience. We may not be responsible for others actions, but we are of our own, and what perspective we label the experience as makes all the difference in the world! Do we hold on with rage? Or do we acknowledge it with a smile of compassion and move on with the greater and brighter things that can shape our day for the better!
What is your choice today?